Probably my biggest frustration with online relationships, whether casual or long term is no one says what they want, if they even know what it is.
I pride myself on being one of the most honest people you’ll ever meet. Or, at least, top ten.
What do I want? Well–nope, never mind. No one gives a shit.
Let me see your tits. How do you like getting fucked? Are you a bad girl? Do you live alone? What the access to your balcony like? When can you come sit on my face/suck me off? You like it up the ass? How big are those tits? Show me your ass. *Dick pic. Dick pic. Dick pic.* I’m not bothered by this type, because at least there’s no runaround. What bothers me is when they sling around rude comments when I say I’m not up for it.
I want your number. I want to text you until your phone explodes. I want pictures of everything, don’t care if they’re nudes. Your face. Your car. Your new pants. Show me, I want to see it all. Tell me how your day is going, I’m going to ask you again right away because I’m not really paying attention. Just talk to me. All day. Are you mad? Why aren’t you replying? You know for a fat chick you’re pretty picky. You’re just a bitch, fuck you.
Hey…want to hang out?
J-j-jaded. All women are the devil. You’re all liars. My ex-wife/girlfriends/partners shit is still in my garage and maybe I’ll give it back to her, maybe I’m selling it on kijiji right now. Want to hang out? I can’t date, women just want to suck you dry after all, but come over, we’ll get high/drunk. I’m not weird, I promise. I’m still in love with her though. Let’s just hang out and maybe cuddle. I’m lonely. Come over and watch a movie, let’s cuddle.I may still be in love with my ex but I want to talk about how cool you are. She’s not cool, you’re so cool, so, want to hang out?
I come across as half-decently normal. Make half-decently normal conversation but I don’t really ask you anything about yourself. I really seem like a nice guy, in fact, I call myself a nice guy. What do I want?
I want to hang out, fuck you a few times, and then chuck you because in a dispensable world of swipes and likes, you’re dispensable, and so am I.
I want you to have my kids. I’ve recently lost weight/in the process want to start my new life right now. My new life change is happening right now my new job/passion/hobby I want everything to be about you but I don’t really care to get to know you slowly because I want it right now. I can give you everything, I’ll make you my queen, or maybe her, I’ll make her my queen too. It doesn’t really matter to me because I just want someone.
Yes, I’m fully aware that people do meet their partners on tinder/POF/OKCupid/Match, whatever, and I’m sure that they were none of the above. So far, for women, there’s only two categories as they LGBTQ community where I live isn’t very large. More poly couples that anything.
Maybe when I meet someone that I actually end up dating for a while, then I’ll revamp.